So I was wondering around on the Internet the other day and stumbled onto this post. She has some good points that I have been really thinking about.
How do you decide who to forgive? I don't think it is something I really have ever thought about. I know when a family member hurts me I dwell on it for a little while and maybe vent some but it usually is set aside and normal life continues. There may be a comment or two about it thrown out there that may or may not be nice but other than that it is over with. I am sure that is not healthy. If it is a close friend that is like family pretty much the same applies.
However thinking about all of this if it is someone that I am not close to I am caught off guard by the hurt and for some reason it seems to bother me more. I tend not to let go of it and the enemy constantly brings it up in my mind. I do forgive but not forget. Mostly because when I am not close to them I want to talk about it because I want to be sure they are ok with me before I put myself out there again. If it ever does get talked about then it is much easier to forget. I think it works the other way too. When I stick my foot in my mouth I am waiting on them to go off on me so I can apologize. I don't want to just bring it up out of no where in case it didn't bother them. Then I sit there while I am talking to them really not listening just wanting to apologize and I don't have the guts. Most of the time I go home and pray about it ask God for forgiveness and pray that if they are hurt by me it will not be used by the enemy and they will find a way to forgive me.
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6 comments:
That is great! Very well said! I love it!
It is something to ponder on and think about...you have some very good points also...
Forgiveness is the responsibility of the forgiver. It's not given based on the other person's attitude or "expected" response that you will get back. If you don't ask someone to forgive you with a true heart, it's pointless.
If they don't forgive you, it's THEIR problem, and they can answer for that. I think as long as we are LEGIT in assuming responsibility for our own actions, and are true of heart when asking someone to accept an apology, it's all we can do. Check out my search engine on my blog, and read blame game. Forgiveness is not a strong point of mine, typically. I am getting better, but at the same time, if you do the same thing with the same attitude, you get the same results, therefore, there are just some people that sometimes are better off distanced from us, at least for the time being. See ya tonight!!
What beautiful boys, Christina! I enjoyed browsing your blog, and seeing your family. I also enjoyed getting to know you last night.
Answers to any questions our little minds can come up with are always found in the living and powerful word of God:
"All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work." 2 Timothy 3:16-17
"For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins." Matthew 6:14-15
"Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times." Matthew 18:21-22
"Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Ephesians 4:31-32
"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful." Colossians 3:12-15
Alright seminary sister. As Beth Moore would say is your reality your theology. Mercy. Isn't that how she said it. I dislike trying to remember people's words. I always get them mixed up.
because we're human, it's hard to match up to the Godly standards in a lot of areas of life. but psalm 103:12 says that God removes our sin as far as the east is from the west, and He never brings them back up. so to me, the Godly standard of forgiveness is that i am to forget as well. way easier said than done, and i'm a work in progress on that.
also, most of the time, forgiveness benefits the forgiver much more than the one being forgiven. ask shelley if she'll lend you a book i gave her a little while back that deals with this :-)
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